I hate falling in love.

It is truly a dark day. I have done something I vowed to myself some months ago I would never do. I can blame it on the words of the people around me, or the things I can do because of it, but it is entirely my doing and there's no escaping that simple fact. I have fallen in love with that plucky little Toyota. I have found a friend in the heaving groaning mess of a machine, a car with more character than many people in this world. I can not deny that I have become attached in a profound way to this car that I shouldn't own in the first place. I cleaned the inside, I washed and waxed it. I'm fixing things that aren't necessary and it's starting to look better. It's getting it's second wind, rejuvenated and soon will be ready to kick some ass. But I can't treat it like a machine anymore...

My plans keep changing. I have a basic idea of what I want: a car that can do everything. But it's the method that I'm flip flopping on. Half of me wants to save up, drive her around the way she is, and eventually tear her down, paint her, and do a 1-JZ swap. She'd have, as near as makes no difference, 300 hp and 270 ft-lbs of torque. She would be the fastest car I own. She'd be insane and impressive and the apple of everyone's eye. But she wouldn't be MY car. The other half of me has gotten intensely accustomed to the 4-pot that's in her. It's snarly and spits and coughs. I feel like the chassis could handle being ludicrously quick, but that's not what I need in my life. I need fun, I need unique, I need myself. She may not be the strongest thing out there, she may not be the fastest, nor the smartest, nor impressively handsome, but she's determined and quirky. She is new belts, a new intake, fuel system, electrical system, and header from being twice as powerful. Yes she'll still be a bit of a pig, but she'll be a happy little high revving piggy with a smile on her snout and a friend behind the wheel.

So here's me being selfish. Here's me saying that I'm going to do what I damn well please and I don't want to hear what everyone else has to say. I'll build a monster when I have money. But until then, I'm starting my automotive family. I am and always will be smitten by the Aztec Red beauty that I'm identified by, but I have found room in my heart for the goofy little yota that sits just out my window as I type this.

...she broke down on me yesterday. I was driving back from Myrtle Beach. She ran fine for about an hour and a half, then lost power on the section of the highway with no shoulder. She stopped in the right hand lane in mid day traffic. It wasn't until I pleaded with the car to run that she nutted up and pushed herself, driving for about thirty feet on nothing but the starter until she finally spit smoke and fired. The car ran wide open with 99% of the fuel filter clogged. The car burnt the tire through 3 gears on nothing but will and fumes. She did that for me. I couldn't ask for more, especially considering that it's my own procrastination that allows this to happen. I need to clean and rebuild the fuel system. I want to do 4 side draft individual carbs, a cleaned and lined tank and steel lines with an electric fuel pump. Then she'll be properly fed.

It's become far too easy to be this way. I have some perplexing things going on in my life, some people I don't understand and situations that I'm too inept to read. But in spite of breaking down on me, I find her solid in the same way that I find Vanessa solid. These cars are my security blanket. This Celica is my new friend yet I feel like I've known her for years. She loves me, trying her hardest knowing that I will reciprocate that effort.

So much life from something made of steel and glass. If that's not magic, I don't know what is.

Hearing crickets in here.

It's been, what 5 months since my last post. I had lost interest in this. Nothing really interesting going on, or too caught up in doing. But it's been long enough, I think it's time to get some thoughts down. So here's a recap of what's going on and things to come and whatever the hell else I want. So here goes...

Project Celica is underway: It is currently 6:21pm on day three of the shock install on my 1981 Celica ST project car and it's raining, so I'm spending my time doing this. No homework, no chores left, nothing better to do.

I've found out a lot about the car in doing this, namely, it needs a lot of work. While everything is solid, there are a lot of things left that need improvement. First off, my dad and I took it for a test drive today. When I got the car, it rode like an old caddy. With just the fronts shocks replaced, it rides like a newer cadillac. Still not great, but a huge improvement. It's also gotten a lot flatter over bumps where the nose used to bounce incessantly. Even so, transitions are much, MUCH better. And it's no wonder, the old shocks did nothing for dampening. I actually think they were the original pieces. Another strange thing is that the strut is welded to the brake from the factory, so taking the shock out required moving the brakes around. Someone with muscles is a huge help.

It's also been an awesome bonding experience for my dad and I. Not like we needed another, but he's never done a shock job either. I always wait for him to get home from work, and we've been having a blast working on it and driving it around.

I plan on really building this car. Properly. But I am aiming for fun rather than straight out speed. I want to put in a 1-JZ(280hp 264 tq's), costs running and with transmission for $2300 shipped. I want to weld the diff and put in ground control springs, bucket seats, and rack and pinion steering. It'll run on steelies and look just as junky as it does now. It'll be a sleeper, a ricer with the muscle to back it up. And I want to make a shift lever cover out of drift wood I got from Bull island (get it? DRIFT wood :D). But money is short and Jobs elude me. Working on that.

The 24hr. Karting race: So May 28th, some friends of mine and I entered the Victory Lane Karting 24hr Enduro. It was brutal, tiring, and expensive. But we were the only privateer team and we didn't lose completely. We came in 13th out of 15, which may seem embarrassing, but when you consider that these were the highest ranked karting teams in the country (and some international), We didn't do that bad. Yes the 2 teams we beat withdrew, but part of an enduro is finishing. Things learned: Enduro's are really tiring, we're not nearly as fast as we thought, and Pro karting teams are made almost exclusively out of douche-nozzles. We had so many people be so rude to us that I want to do as much as I can to mess with them next time we go. Next time, We go themed as Mario Kart Characters. YOSHI ALL UP IN THIS BITCH!!! Props to Nate, Kat, Zach, Chris, and Zack. It was fun guys!

Hmm, what else: OH!, I got an offer from Baker Motor Company to drive the new IPL G Coupe when it comes in. I'm really excited, expect a feature on it. The fun part is the camera car we're going to use is a G37 S Sedan. Gonna submit that one to Jalopnik, maybe I could get a freelance job out of it, or at least my name out there. Eh, whatevs.

So I get to teach someone how to drive stick tomorrow. I'm looking forward to it as they always stall it the first time. This'll be the third person I've taught and it has turned out well previously. But being me, I don't just teach them how to start off and change gears, I teach downshifting and weight transfer. It's going to be a hoot!.

EDIT: lol, she backed out. Surprised? nah.

I'm also getting super low on cash. I've gotten to the point that I can either go to Zach's birthday weekend (which Is priority) in Clemson, or I can go to the CMP karting event (which I'm not giving up on, Taking donations now), or I can sell something (Where the hell are my Pokemon cards?!)

More stuff later, I'm kind of getting tired of writing now and I'm running out of stuff to say. So you guys keep the rubber to the road, gas in the tank, and your knuckles white. I'm out!

My Vimeo account: http://vimeo.com/zmankellan